The porcelain called my stream of urine like a calf for its mother. I unzipped and let it fly, splash splash. I sighed and looked straight away. Above the urinal was a poster, one of these new advert boards that attack you while you are drunk and susceptible to their methods. It said this:
Get a DELL or HP computer for only $29.99 a month!
I pondered this pitch in my inebriation and realized that for a $19.56 monthly credit card payment, I could buy a Smith & Wesson Model 39 9mm handgun and a box of ammo, go home, load a round in the chamber and blow my brains all over the wall. I ask you what is the better deal? Exactly… AND I never have to actually make a payment on the gun, so I win both ways.
Oh, the feisty feline faeries of Farhnoor (silent h) have been in activity upon my digital bits and have given us 118 new cats for this month. I know, this year has totally been lacking in creativity and impulse. But, I HAVE been working on another book (And so has Beth McNelley) and the 2010 Bad Cat calendar. There will be more news about the book this coming week. There will also be more new cats up on the site this week. Maybe another 50 or 60 or so. Many thanks and $$$ to Beth for helping me with the book, the calendar, and the cats now appearing.
Oh, new word of the month is Jewnius. Some examples:
- Einstein laid bare the working of the universe with his Special Theory of Relativity. He was a Jewnius of the highest order.
- After escaping captivity, Schoenberg killed four Nazi guards with a pine needle and half a shoe. He was a historic Jewnius.
The first appearance of the word is found in the book of Shemot, where it describes Moses as he devises a plan to lead the Jews from captivity under Pharaoh. Write it down and use it in synagogue.
It is said that if you look at a girl’s mother, you will see what she will look like in her later years. For someone obsessed with older women, that may be a good piece of advice. Though, I also have to wonder if someone obsessed with children would be able to claim that looking at pictures of the same girl when she was a child would give an inclination as to how attractive children of this person will appear. Attractive for immoral purposes I fear.