As it is the tradition at MCHY to insult and denigrate all cultures and people equally, we shall call today HoliMasUkkahNza, because it is also our tradition to bring cultures together in union. Of course, that is only so that we may cast fun at them collectively and save calories.
So, we say on this day, Awesome HoliMasUkkahNza to you all!
It is snowing in MCHY-land (Seattle) and is making life miserable for your lowly narrator. People say if I had children it would be so much more different… fun in the snow!
Hey, if I had kids a LOT would be different. The laundry would be done every week, there would always be a fresh beer in my hand. The driveway would be shoveled and I would have a regiment of snow warriors guarding my abode. I would sleep well at night, knowing my children were standing watch at specified posts throughout the house, armed with taser guns and flash-bang grenades, lest an intruder attempt to disturb my respite. Oh yes my lovelies, if I had children it would be a different world indeed. The thing is… how to beget an army of mercenaries without the involvement of the opposite sex? Until that is figured out, I will gripe and whine about the snow.
There will be more cats this evening for your HoliMasUkkahNza pleasure.
Don’t forget to buy the My Cat Hates You book at your local book dealer! It makes the perfect HoliMasUkkahNza gift (which lasts for 2^5 or 0x00100000 days).
Remember: when John Walsh cries… EVERYBODY cries.