MCHY is recommended for adults by adults.
Hello all you crazy cat people! Let me just say to you, in the words of the immortal John Sands, “Holy cow!”.
I have been away from MCHY since the beginning of the March, on personal business. My great-great grandfather died. The Iraq war is 6 years old now. Many more cats to do, though. I must be upon it!
Why is this ad on the List of Craig? Reality Show Script Writer Needed (Seattle)
Reality TV script?
Nuff said ladies and germs! The Kid is back in Seattle.
More cats are upcoming. I been out of town for a few weeks… but more fun is to be had.
I kiss you!
Annnd… The greatest player in Japan’s history, the Babe Ruth of Nippon, Ichiro Suzuki, brings the world title home. Congrats Ichi! And will you please come to fucking SPRING TRAINING so I can see you before I leave Peoria? Junior Griffey is not to be seen here.
In other cat news, I have no news. I hope you are well. Happy Spring!
Awesome news, Chris. You shred on a totally different level, oh my brother. Now you, Chris, are my American Idol. Taking down that disturbed man that will now rot in jail for terrorism charges was an act of bravery above and beyond that of any drummer, bass player, or chick singer. You have struck a G Chord in the hearts of children worldwide who wonder if being in a crappy band will ever pan out and bring them fame. You have proven YES IT WILL!
Is it just me or have we heard enough from Tom Cruise? He is the Valkyrie! Watch Tom fly. As I look at his career from asshole college kid to asshole fighter pilot to asshole pool player to asshole bartender to asshole Vietnam vet to asshole race car driver to asshole Irishman to asshole Marine to asshole lawyer to asshole vampire to asshole secret agent to asshole hitman, etc… I realize that the freak has only been in 34 movies. This makes a star? The only thing he has going is his need for media attention, a weird toothy smile, and the fact his ex-wife looks like a Cupie doll. Oh yeah, I forget he is mired in a made-up religion that believes *I* am somehow responsible for the evacuation of the Tryylians from their home planet. (Which can NOT be true because the planet they were inhabiting during the NECESSARY evacuation due to the Gqqserua War was one that they inhabited after the Invasion of Krglahr in which 40000 Vertookz warriors died in prison camps. Don’t blame ME Tom whose-last-name-isn’t-even-Cruise!)
I am starting to get annoyed with people who say ‘actual’ or ‘actually’ when it is completely not a required part of the sentence they are speaking. WHAT? Examples you want?
Well, fuck me. I am starting like this ACTUAL thing. I guess the virtual thing was becoming passe, so people started to pay attention to REAL THINGS. Praise the lord for actuality.
Before I get to new kitties, I hadda go through 500+ feedbacks. Check the Litterbox for at least 50 new additions. You will cry, you will laugh. There are the usual happy good job Jim ones, but some classic examples of why this site is not the walk in the park it may seem to be.
So far, this year has brought massive rain and snow and flooding to my beloved Northwest. Which is why I am on the fast track OUT OF HERE within the month. Expect a LARGE batch of new, very poignant and hilarious cats before then. No holds barred! According to the Litterbox entries, I can’t make fun of anything except a cat sitting on a couch, so… it will be a labor of love.
Who am I kidding. The new cats will be as irreverent as always, hating you, me, Obama, Stephen Hawking, Britney, Carl Sagan, Joan d’Arc, The Great Gazoo, The Pet Rock, Kid Rock, Chris Rock, Hard Rock, Sinbad’s Roc, Rock of Ages, the IRS, the IRA and so much more.
How are your New Year’s resolutions holding up? Smoked any crystal meth yet? The way I look at it… if I resolve not to drink booze anymore, I can still lick toads and sniff Liquid Paper. Hey, that is not a family friendly thing to say!
Much love to ALL of you. And I do mean ALL.
It is the new year of us! Hooray we! More kitties who hate you are in the wings. Piles and piles I look at.
The best moment of 2008 you ask? A few for sure for MCHY.
It is a question that lingers like garlic breath: when is someone a porn star? If I were to say to my friend Hans, “Hans, do you know of the one called Harrison Ford?” the answer would come in the form of an affirmative. If I were to say, “Oh my brother, have you known the delights of Eve Lawrence?” he would shake his head with the quaking of the unknowing. But women in these Internet-only adult movie clips, or DVD erotica, or even something shot on film, will refer to themselves as porn STARS, when my neighbor’s wife does now know their name. I suggest that they refrain from casting themselves in the glow of stardom and let an independent body of judges make such distinctions. They are properly low-tiered adult entertainers. Not adult movie actors even, because the art of the XXX movie has left, save for some of Evan Stone and Randy Spears’ work.
“Gandhiji, Gandhiji, ve have come all the vay from London to help your vork.”
“Good my friends, but there vill be much suffering.”
“Gandhiji, for that ve are prepared.”
“Yes, of course. There vill also be much abuse from the British.”
“Gandhiji, ve have lived in London for seven years. For abuse from the British ve are prepared.”
“Excellent. And of course, there vill be MUCH pain.”
“Ve are from Britain! Ve have the best Mackintoshes!”
“No! Not RAIN, you idiots. Pain… PAIN! There vill be much pain!”
“Ahhh. Then ve must be leaving, Gandhiji, because for that, ve are NOT prepared!”
*shuffle out of the room*