F. A. Q.

I submitted my cat, but I can't find it. What gives?

There are many factors as to why your cat may not be here. Given the daily influx of submissions to this site, I must be prudent in deciding which cats actually make it onto the site.

• The majority of the submissions are of low-quality images, so they are dismissed outright.
• Then, there is the 'best-interest' factor. Let us be honest at this juncture. A picture of a cat sitting on a couch, while very special or beautiful to the owner, may not be in the best interest of the site. Those images are a dime a dozen, and unless there is a naked chick or slaughtered lamb in the picture, they are dismissed.
• After this, the EVIL factor comes into the equation. To hate or not to hate? That is the question I then must ask of the image. Does this cat really hate, or is he merely perturbed? The answer to this narrows the field even more.
• Lastly, it comes down to my ability to devise a clever, if not humourous, caption for the feline's inner motivations.
• On top of all this, there is also a grading scale I learned from my many years of working for Microsoft. Each image is judged within the group of all other images of the same general timeframe. i.e. I get 30 images, which all suck, but the top 5 will advance to the website.

I would apologize to all those who's feisty felines did not make the cut to the site, but my fingers would grow tired of typing.

Where are the Home and Links links?

At the bottom of each MCHY page. Also, the banner graphic at the top of each page links to Home.

Who writes all the captions?

As of September 11, 2004, I, Jim, write all the captions. Yes, I have hijacked free-speech in the better interest of the web site. However, going back to December 2001, I have written probably 99% of them, sometimes using the captions submitted by the owners, but that got problematic in that people started to tell me I sucked. When it was really YOU that sucked. So, taking after our Fearless Leader, I made a pre-emptive strike against Weapons of Bad Captions.

F. U. Q.

• What kind of assholes are you guys?
• Do my cats really hate me?
• If my cat farts and I am not around, does it still smell?
• Isn't your email address assholes@mycathatesyou.com?
• I want to send you a picture of my pussy, but it gets stuck to the scanner. What am I doing wrong?
• Are people really as funny as the captions make them out to be, or are you guys creative geniuses?